Walking in my Shoes
by Severina
Summary: it's my first shot at a song fic, rated PG13 for implied killing (you never actually see any death...)


I decided to try my hand at a song fic, as i've decided my story about Vegeta's mother isn't going in the direction i want it to. I'll finish eventually, once i can get this plot line to lose the holes it's got in it...GRRR...anyway, I love this song, and i thought it would fit very well. Before we start, know i used what Tenshinan said in the dubbed version as the very beginning of the fic. Ok and DBZ isn't mine and neither is the song "Walking in my Shoes" by Depeche Mode off their "Songs of Faith and Devotion" album.  
  
  
"I won't wear the same uniform as Vegeta, not after all the horrible things he's done." Tenshinan said condescendingly, glaring at the Prince. He simply tossed a smirk over his shoulder and flew from the lookout to find the monster Cell.   
He was itching to test his power; he couldn't wait to bring the monster to his knees, to prove himself the strongest, to claim his destiny. Even as his excitement rose, he could still here the three-eyed warrior's comment in the back of his mind. He smirked and forced it into silence. Yes, he had done some horrible things in his life. He would never apologize for any of them. And he didn't care what they all thought of him; they could never understand what his life had been like up to this point.  
  
** I would tell you about the things  
They put me through  
The pain I've been subjected to  
But the Lord himself would blush**  
  
None of them would understand what it was like being raised by a monster like Frieza. The scalding lows and the freezing highs that the roller coaster of his life had been. There were some moments that may have even resembled some sort of happiness during those years. Indulgence was something Frieza had no problem with, he encouraged his men to partake in any deviant behavior they saw fit. Frieza never lacked a supply of beautiful women, who were more than willing to please his best men. Vegeta had taken advantage of that to the fullest extent, sometimes two or three women at a time. That was only one of the perks to his job. There was money beyond the dreams of any capitalist, and his personal favorite, the rare chance to destroy an entire planet under Frieza's gaze. In those moments Frieza's smirk almost resembled pride in his protégéé.  
  
**The countless feasts laid at my feet  
Forbidden fruits for me to eat  
But I think your pulse would start to rush**  
  
And then there were the lows that outnumbered the highs. They wiped away any trace of hope, even in the most strong willed of Frieza's men. That's why his army was so perfect and unstoppable. Men without hope will latch onto anything to survive. Anger, pride, fear, they became Vegeta's life preservers in a raging sea of cruelty and humiliation. His future, his fate had been taken from him, stolen like candy, so easily. His father was killed for pride, and his mother was dead for the sake of principle. Even his planet had been taken, scattered to the far reaches of the galaxy so it would not even have the slightest notion of putting itself back together again. Anger was the wall he encased his heart in, pride kept him standing even when everything in him wanted to lay down and die, and fear kept him trapped for far too long. Nothing mattered, and cruelty soon became a sick way of revenge. Gallons of blood drenched his hands that wouldn't come clean, and he didn't ask for forgiveness. He did not believe himself worthy of it in his heart, even if his mind told him that in the grand scheme of things, those countless souls didn't matter anyway.  
  
** Now I'm not looking for absolution  
Forgiveness for the things I do  
But before you come to any conclusions  
Try walking in my shoes.**  
  
In his opinion, not one of the warriors that he had fought beside on Nameck or here on Earth could have survived his life. They would have all lay down with the rest of the weaklings, all to happy to be slaughtered on the battlefield. Or perhaps they would have been killed fighting for the sake of "justice." Vegeta had learned long ago that there was no such thing in this universe, so to not even try to fight for it, especially when revenge was so much sweeter. He knew that Kakarot would never have done what the prince had done to survive, he would have failed. His sweet manner and vacant mind would have left him open for unimaginable cruelty and suffering at the hands of Frieza and his right hand man, Zarbon. They would have eaten him for breakfast. He may have suffered humiliation at their mercy, but he was smart enough to keep an ace up his sleeve for later. His brilliant political skills kept him alive, near the top of the ranks, and one of the "favorates" that Frieza insisted on keeping around, sometimes at all costs.  
  
**Try walking in my shoes  
You'll stumble in my footsteps  
Keep the same appointments I kept  
If you try walking in my shoes  
If you try walking in my shoes**  
  
Perhaps the natural blood lust of a Saiyan had predisposed him to be good at what he did, to take a certain joy in the shiver of fear that he could send down almost anyone's spine just by walking into a room. To know that his reputation of a cold-blooded killer spread like wildfire throughout Frieza's army kept a smug smirk on his face. Regardless of that reputation, he was still the one to suffer Frieza's wrath. That's probably why he was kept around. Frieza was still scared of him, scared of the prophecy that had been made at his birth, that he was The One, the next Super Saiyan. To keep Vegeta in check, he assaulted him with a barrage of insults to his title and race at every turn. Vegeta heard them, and stored them in the anger he held, fueling him to become more ruthless as time progressed. Soon entire planets ran for cover when they heard he might come to them, knowing they would find no mercy at his hand. He took pleasure in watching people beg for mercy, even when they knew it wouldn't come. Somewhere, deep in his core, he felt something like pity for the people who he killed, but it was fleeting, intangible and gone before it could register with his mind. Those people were the sacrifice to his revenge. They suffered because his future been taken for him, they paid the price he was not strong enough to make Frieza pay. But he would be, and then Frieza would be the one begging for mercy in front of the prince.  
  
**Morality would frown upon  
Decency look down upon  
The scapegoat's fate made of me**  
  
As he became stronger, he knew the time was coming to escape from the binds that had held him for countless years. The perfect opportunity came in the form of a planet called Earth and things known as dragon balls. They were the keys to his immortality and to Frieza's demise. He would kill the cocky lizard while laughing, making sure that his laughter was the sound that carried him into the next dimension. When he came to Earth, facing the warriors here had seemed like such a simple task until Kakarot had come into the picture. In that fight not only did he lose his tail, the part of him that was a reminder of his Saiyan ancestory but part of his pride as well. A third class fighter had beaten him, the unbeatable Prince of all Saiyans, the chosen, The One. He tried to think of it as a simple snag in his plans; he would still kill Frieza after achieving immortality. Making it even sweeter was the thought of the death of the simple Saiyan at his hand. He would kill him for insulting his Prince, for turning his back on his race, for being so kindhearted even towards his enemies. He had a right to kill Kakarot just as he did Frieza. He would reclaim his destiny through their murders.  
  
** But I promise now my judge and jurors  
My intentions couldn't have been purer  
My case is easy to see**  
  
However, fighting there alongside them on Nameck, a strange sort of alliance was formed. He found himself doing things that he never would have done even for his own men. He had saved their lives, the little bald one and Kakarot's half-breed son. He said it was because without them he would never be able to defeat the Ginyu force without immortality. After promising himself he wouldn't be that weak again, he pushed the brat out of the way of a ki blast. That one he could still not explain. And then there was Kakarot himself. There he was another Saiyan with strength that more than rivaled his own. This meant he had to die, but it could be postponed till after Vegeta killed Frieza. But that had been denied him, just like every other fate he had felt belonged to him in his life. First was the shock of seeing a third class warrior glowing with the power of the Legendary One. Then just as he was about to attack and kill his life long tormentor, he was taken to this little ball of dirt in the far reaches of the galaxy. Two things he believed his birthright had been taken from him instantaneously. Still Kakarot had not killed Frieza; he left him for dead before Nameck had exploded. That gave Vegeta another chance that had been snatched away by a mysterious Super Saiyan boy, whom he later learned was his son. The only comfort he dared take in that was it was his blood that had killed the Ice-jins that spring day. So that left him basically stranded on this rock with nothing to hold onto but a dream of surpassing Kakarot He used his iron will to train his body into doing what he wanted. And in that display of willpower, he became almost tolerable in the eyes of some of the warriors on this planet. Their pseudo-acceptance didn't matter to him in the least.  
  
**I'm not looking for a clearer conscience  
Peace of mind after what I've been through  
And before we talk of any repentance  
Try walking in my shoes**  
  
Flying at breakneck speed, he knew that not one of the other warriors could ever imagine his life and that not one of them even wanted to try. Even though they held animosity toward him as he did toward them, they had their faith in him to defeat the monster intent on destroying the world. He couldn't care less about their faith, but the fact they were watching gave him another goal. He would prove himself stronger than Kakarot and prove once and for all that he was the strongest Saiyan in the entire universe. He would reclaim his birthright. The thought of victory made him smile.  
  
**Try walking in my shoes  
You'll stumble in my footsteps  
Keep the same appointments I kept  
If you try walking in my shoes  
If you try walking in my shoes  
Try walking in my shoes.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Well, what did you think? 


End file.
